Codependency Sucks

Codependency is the disease that destroys relationships, friendships, and the workplace. But what is it? Everything written so far will tell you what codependency looks like, what the symptoms of codependency are. This book tells you exactly what codependency is and how to end this killer in a direct, healthy, careful, caring way.

How do you know if you're in a codependent situation? It's easy. You feel as though you're getting the less than you're giving. You may feel as though the life is being sucked out of you. You feel physically, mentally, emotionally drained. In the beginning you may only have a feeling of vague dissatisfaction. Eventually the dissatisfaction becomes deep unhappiness, maybe even depression. If you're in a codependent relationship you may do all of the work for that relationship, especially the emotional work. You may do all the giving and none of the receiving. Or perhaps you're being smothered with gifts, advice, and suggestions. Someon!e may be manipulating you to get their needs met. You may do all the emoting and feeling, especially the anger emoting, while the other person looks at you as though you've gone over the edge. You may be the lightening rod for releasing anger for your spouse and children, lover, friends, co-workers, etc. Everyone hates you for your angry outbursts, but they stay with you because you are their only connection to the world of emotions. They need the emotional release your angry outbursts provide. When one person does all the work of a relationship, there is no relationship, just the illusion of a relationship. When you quit doing all the work, the truth comes out and the illusion ends. Many people die in these codependent relationships, hating each other but needing each other desperately for reasons they don't even remotely understand. CODEPENDENCY SUCKS will give you understanding of the navigational system Mother Nature has given to each of us and what happens when people are crippled by loss of some or all of the spirit senses. Bear! with me...the physical senses are: sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste. Life is enormously more difficult if we lose one or more of these senses. There are laws to protect those of us who have physical disabilities. Our intellectual senses are: reasoning, deducting, analyzing, remembering, and organizing information. Again, life can be very difficult if we don't have use of any or all of these faculties. They have laws to protect people with these kinds of deficiencies. The unconscious part of a human being also has senses. These senses are emoting (of the emotions we are experiencing), sensing (observing and understanding the emotions of others), dreaming, imagining, and intuiting. Codependents decide somewhere in their early lives to stop feeling, emoting, dreaming, imagining and/or intuiting. Deadening the spirit senses becomes habitual. Being cut off from the unconscious, spirit self is extremely painful. Because they are only attached to the physical and intellectual parts of their beings, they don't feel alive. In order to feel alive they MUST connect to something outside of self. Alcoholics and addicts generally are codependent with their drug of choice...it's what makes them feel o.k., alive and well. They will chase the original feelings of wellness they got from alcohol and drugs to their deaths. Workaholics only feel alive when working. Food addicts, gamblers, sex and love addicts experience the same feelings of aliveness from their anesthesia. There are people who only feel alive through their religion, through sports, through makeup, clothing, cars and houses. And there are people who only feel alive when they are glommed onto other people. This brand of codependent takes their identity from who they are attached to. It can be a husband, wife, child(ren), friend, wealthy patron...you name it. People who are detached from the spirit self can and will attach to anyone who gets too near. The solution is relatively simple. But it takes some hard work and rigorous honesty. Sometimes the codepe! ndent has to lose everyone they've ever loved before they will confront their own issues. Read Codependency Sucks and you'll understand why today's world is so wildly dysfunctional. You'll also understand how easily we can step out of the chaos we and others have created. And you'll develop relationships that are solid, healthy, and very, very real. No more illusions. No more games playing.